Wednesday, December 19, 2007

28 weeks...seems like forever since I typed anything

Well Tyler and I are here in McKinney Texas now. I already love it here, I mean I miss my home and all but nothing beats family! We've met with our new doctor and we really like him I feel like we're finally getting things done and questions answered. We also met with a perinatoligist (not sure how to spell that) He is the doctor that does ultrasounds on us every 3-4 weeks. He was so informative about everything and it turns out our girls might be identical. Our last doctor just assumed they were fraternal but never looked. This doctor wasn't so sure and it looks like will have them tested when they come out (if of course they look the same). I've gained about 40 lbs now and am 40 inches around... YIKES! I've started sewing all there bedding and that is a fun project I just love all the fabrics I picked out and this is something I've always dreamed of being able to doing. Tyler also brought up the fact that everything was right around the corner and we needed to get stuff ordered... so this week I've ordered my cribs and and dresser then I went to wal-mart and stocked up on all the goodies... diapers, wipes, shampoo, lotion, thermometer, sheets... you name it. I'm still not done I need one trip to babys r us and I should be finished. Everything just seems so real!!! We've also officially agreed on our names and its so sweet listening to Gabe and Chase talking about their cousins and using there names. Today it was all about what Santa was bringing the girls... guess I got to get a stocking stuffed for them. I'll try and post some new pictures this week. I've been pretty bad the last two weeks actually doing that. Sorry!

Monday, December 3, 2007

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

22 weeks

I just thought I would let you know some of the things we've been up to. Last week Tyler went out of town and I started experiencing some dizzy spells and blurred vision. It was pretty scary since I was by myself and I didn't know who to call. I called the doctor and they wanted me to come into labor and delivery to be monitored if it got any worse but I was definitely to come in the next morning to get some tests done. Well I got up and drove myself... the doctors and nurses were a little freaked out that I did that, but I really didn't have any other options. They did all the tests and they said all was fine they didn't know what was wrong. Then last minute they decided to take my iron. In July I was a 14 which is good. Bad is considered 11.6... I was a 10!!! So they took my blood through my arm and took it to the lab. In the mean time they gave me these iron pills that made me fill very sick. Fortunately Monday I got a call and I'm 11.9 so I don't have to take the pills. Still not sure why I was getting so dizzy and blurred vision, the only thing I can think of is that my iron dipped low that night.

I've finished up Kidstuf at church... which is a good thing because I can't jump anymore!!! I was starting to look pretty pitiful. Not to mention the constant braxton hicks that I got while dancing. But I'm very very very sad to be done! I had lots of tears on Sunday and lots of hugs from all the kids that I've gotten to work with, they are truly some of the sweetest kids they are going to be missed tremendously. Not to mention the staff, can I just say that working for Buckhead church has been one of the most rewarding things I've ever done. The first thing I did when I moved to Atlanta was try out this church and then decided I wanted to volunteer so that I could make some friends. I loved every minute of it, I loved getting up early on Sundays and spending my Wednesday evenings there. I wish I could keep doing it and just sling two babies on my hips.

Halloween is over and if you know me that means that the decorations can come out of hiding. (The music began the beginning of October) Unfortunately since were moving I cant take out everything and it really is driving me nuts. I've made Tyler take me to the mall to look at decorations, I've gone to Heeney's three times. Heeney's is a store that only interior designers are allowed into and you can buy these beautiful ornaments and well basically anything you can imagine. My girlfriend Stephanie put me on her card as a buyer and I've fully taken advantage of that card. I seriously want to cry ever time I walk into that store the decorations are so beautiful. I took Tyler my last time and he was pretty amazed by it (and you know its awesome if he is amazed). Anyways, since I cant decorate I had to finish some crafts that I new I wasn't going to get a chance to do next Christmas. So I've finished beading the girls stockings, now I'm just waiting for Tyler to decide on what pictures he wants me to create inside this space. As soon as I get to Dallas I can work on the tree skirt.... and Auntie Andrea's house :)

As for movement.... I always thought that Twin A was the mellow one. I felt her very rarely but when we had the ultrasound she was the one doing twirls. Well it started probably on Saturday night but she is constantly kicking. Tyler just sits with his hand on my belly and a big smile on his face. I sometimes just laugh because its so cute. Yesterday while I was in the bath I was watching them make all sorts of weird shapes out of my belly. They can kick and shift as much as they want I just want them to stay out of my ribs, that hurts. I feel like I have a muscle that has ripped apart from my skin on my breast bone. It is so tender, I cant wear a normal bra because its so uncomfortable... Oh well I guess I'll be living in sports bras the rest of this pregnancy.

I know have two and half days left in Atlanta so I need to finish packing my suitcases... Tyler is going to pack the house later :)

Sunday, November 4, 2007

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Two little girls!!!


Wow, I was totally surprised, Tyler thought it was girls all along. It was so amazing to watch them on the screen, I had a smile ear to ear and just wanted to hold Tyler's hand. Will get the pictures posted soon... I promise. I'm so excited to go to the fabric store and pick out all the material to make their bedding. Tyler is total anti-pastel (WHAT) so I'm gonna make him go with me to the store... he's gonna have to get use to it our world is going to be painted pink in the next 4 months :)

Thursday, October 18, 2007

First Baby Shower













We had so much fun, we hung out with the family and ate yummy BBQ, oh yeah and got lots of great baby gifts!!! Thank you everyone for coming I love you all and cant wait to break open all my (I mean their) new toys!!!


18 weeks


OH MY!!! I find out next Tuesday what we're having and I'm pumped. Tyler is still thinking its 2 girls and I'm thinking a boy and a girl. To be more specific I think Twin A is a boy and Twin B is a girl. Will see... Twin B is wild moving all over the place and sometimes making it very uncomfortable. Twin A is very calm, I'm always wondering if its OK. But I think Twin A is like their Daddy "chill" and Twin B is going to be my dancer. Every time I teach a class Twin B gets really wound up.

Friday, September 21, 2007

I want to know they're OK!




14 weeks 13 weeks
I don't know if you can see the difference, but I can. I just seem to keep growing. I know in the next few week I'm gonna get a whole heck of a lot bigger. I'm 15 weeks now and as early as it may sound Tyler was able to feel the babies last night. I don't know if they had they were fighting or what but there was some definite belly action to watch and feel. Of course Tyler though it was gas but I know the difference this was completely different... I felt movement and it was weird. Of course in my mind I keep thinking of everything that could be wrong with my babies and I don't know it. I'm sure every mommy goes through that. The concerns of am I eating all the things I should or are they getting enough oxygen. I cant wait till there 16 week appointment next Friday I need to seem them and reassure myself they are healthy.

Friday, September 14, 2007

I think I have a tap dancer!

Last night (after I was done eating) I was laying on the sofa with my hand on my right side then I felt a tap tap tap. I was a bit shocked so I taped it back and guess what? It taped me right back!!! It was such a wonderful moment I cant wait till I fill the other one move ( I guess soon I'll be feeling lots of movement).

Thursday, September 13, 2007

Where did my hips go?

I was just in the shower and I went to put my hands on my hips and they fell right off. They use to protrude out, now there is nothing, my belly has overtaken!!! I'm still waiting for the moment where everything looks good to eat. I definitely have an appetite just not hungry for anything specific. I woke up this morning at 6:30 starving so finally at 6:45 I realized it wasn't going away and I should just get something so I had an English muffin. Then I went to lay down and decided I was still hungry so I got up and ate yogurt. I then went back to bed again and an hour later still was starving so I got up and had a bagel and loaded cream cheese on it... and guess what? I WAS STILL HUNGRY!!! So then I had lean cuisine bean and rice meal... I was still hungry, ate frozen blueberries. Finally I had to get my errands done so while I was starving I went to wal-mart and got a few grocery. I came home and ate a steak ( a big, thick, juicy one) finally I felt satisfied and when satisfaction hits I get tired so I went to bed and slept for about 2 hours. LOL but then I woke up starving so I had a bowl of ice cream and fortunately I'm OK... will see how long that lasts.

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

End of the first trimester








Well I've got a healthy appetite, I eat and eat and eat and have gained like 2 lbs... I need to gain about 55-60 so I'm working hard at eating and since I've never been an eater its hard. My belly has definitely grown I cant wear any of my old tops anymore they all creep up over my new gut (and they were all long when I got them). So I went shopping this week and bought a few maternity tops. I'm already wearing maternity jeans too... We had our 12 week appointment on Friday and I got to watch both of the little ones moving around, they were like mini babies they didn't look like blobs anymore. They didn't take any pictures this time so I was kinda bummed but my next appointment is in 4 weeks so hopefully they'll take some good pictures then.


Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Happy Anniversary!!!

Today is our 3rd anniversary!!! I love you
more then you will ever know. I still feel giddy when your around. I'm so excited for this new adventure we are sharing together, you are going to make an amazing father. The joy and love I see on your face every time we talk about them is proof to that. Thank you for always being so supportive and tender to me you truly are my Mr. Knightly...

Thursday, August 2, 2007

You've come a long way baby.


8 weeks along...

Morning sickness is here. I've lost between 6 and 8 lbs already. The though of food has me gaging. I absolutely feel horrible because I keep feeding Tyler left overs because I don't want to look at what I'm cooking. I'm hoping the Doctor will have some suggestions tomorrow for me because I want to make sure our little friends are getting the proper nutrition.

On the up side I grew out of my bra and was able to buy my first C cup. Of course I'm living in that bra now.

Tyler continues to be wonderful. He has always got his hand on my belly and kisses it twice every night and tells the babies he loves them. He has been saying all week I get to see my babies on Friday! I wish you could have seen his face at the first Ultra sound. Of course I wanted to watch the babies on the screen but when I looked over at him he had the biggest smile on his face... he has been glowing ever since. He then took me out that night and bought me a belly book. Its a pre baby book all about the belly. So I journal all my stories and post pictures of it growing every week... and trust me its growing. He also decided to cancel cable because we need to get use to not watching it because he doesn't want our kids to watch it. I agree!!! But I guess I will be stocking up all the video classics for later (fraggle rock, duck tails, care bears)

Also I'm 8 weeks along our babies are 5/8 of an inch long and have developed elbow and knee joints. I keep thinking that if 1 baby is 5/8 that means I've got an inch and quarter of baby in me... that's why I'm showing.

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Tallying up the score

Well between all the comments and email we have our results

1 person thinks 6 (Mark)
1 person thinks 5 (LouAnn)
3 people think 4
11 people think 3
8 people think 2
3 people think 1
and Paul thinks 1.6 (confused)

We have our doctors appointment Friday at 10:00 and we are super excited... its like we cant think of anything else... our future is determined by this number.

Thursday, July 12, 2007

Taking a survey

We thought it might be fun to take a survey and see how many babies you think are in my belly. Give us your answers and will post results, then come next Friday we will find out the answer. Sound Fun? OK so Tyler thinks its 3 and I think its 1.... we're waiting for your response.

Friday, July 6, 2007

Thought you might like a belly shot







some of you are curious about my belly. Well because on the OHSS my stomach gets blotted. They tell me that I need to drink lots of water and by the end of the day I look pregnant. I started rubbing vitamin E on it tonight... anybody have anymore tricks?






I'M PREGNANT!!!!

I took my pregnancy test on July 4Th and waited all day to hear back from the clinic, when I didn't hear anything I was crying, seriously that's just mean. The next day I spend all morning trying to get a hold of the clinic and finally I get through and ask if they have gotten the fax about my blood work. I wait on the phone for awhile and then Sarah gets on the phone. I look at my sister (who is with me) and say "go get Tyler!" Tyler comes running out and I put Sarah on speaker phone. Sarah says," well the doctor hasn't had a chance to go through this yet, are you sitting down? YOUR PREGNANT!!!" Heidi went into the house grabbed our video camera and tapped part of the conversation... I'll have to put the post the video soon.

That night Tyler came home from work and said I think we need to go to dinner and celebrate so he took me to Nava and afterwards took me to Barnes and nobles to buy me a pregnancy book (how cute is he!!!)

My HCG level was 175 on Wednesday which is good. Then today I went in for another blood draw and got a call from the clinic.

"Hannah its Sarah, what did you do this morning?"

"take a nap" I said.

"Well we like to see HCG levels double in 2 to 3 days and your is up to 314"

She then explained that next I would need to have an ultrasound done at 6 weeks and 8 weeks and she said that my 6 weeks would be July 18Th. I said isn't that only 4 weeks? She said that technically yes but when someone is determining how far along they are they have to calculate from there first missed cycle making me 4 weeks now and 6 weeks on the 18Th. So tomorrow we will schedule our appointment with the clinic for our ultrasound. They may not be able to determine how many heart beats are there yet but maybe and come August 1st (our 8 week) we should know for sure how many.

Thursday, July 5, 2007

Done Deal.

Its official. Pregnant. Head count first week of August.

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Transfer day...told by Hannah

After taking my shots in the hip for a few days I had become super stiff and achy. I had also woke up that morning with a huge charlie horse in my calf and when I woke up and jerked with the realization I pulled a muscle in my bum bum. Tyler was wonderful though he was helping me walk, stand and sit. By the time Tyler and I were in the car and driving to the clinic I just burst into tears! I'm sure some of it had to do with the overdose of hormones and some was just the fact that my body was in pain but what hit me was thinking "here I am I've always wanted to be a mommy and today I'll get to have my dream, no longer do I get to be selfish and just go to the movies, because now it all about being selfless protecting, raising, nurturing... the list could go on and I am so happy!!!!" So the tears of joy came as I prayed and thanked God for this day.

I arrived at the clinic and was brought back into a room were I took my tranzene and began acupuncture. Studies show that this can increase your success rates and since I've always wanted to try it I thought what a perfect opportunity. I rested with all the needles in me for about 30 minutes all the while drinking water and keeping my bladder full for the procedure.

On the day prior to the procedure we received a call from the Doctor saying that he was going to recommend us to transfer 3-4 embryos rather the original 1 or 2 we discussed. We were pretty stressed out thinking before we would do one unless the doctor gave us a really good reason to do 2. Now we were like OK well I guess will do 2 unless he gives us a really good reason to do 3. Well as soon as I was laying in my room ready for the procedure he said he was going to recommend us doing the 4. My husband being all logic asked question after question trying to figure this out but kept leaving the final decision up to me. I would just say to him "babe I am fine with putting lots in, this is about what your comfortable with" but no the choice remained mine. So finally I said "4 and will pray like crazy!"

I was brought back into the procedure room and they brought out all the embryos in the petrie dish and we were able to look at them on the TV screen above us. I was shaking with nerves and then just kept bring me more blankets and Tyler would just hold my hand, rub my head and give me little kisses all the while looking into my eyes or watching are little family on TV.

It was so cool watching them suck up all our little embryos on one screen and then on the next screen watching them guided through the catheter to be released into me. As soon as they released I panicked and thought "oh no, pull back, what am I thinking, take one out!!!" But to late. I'm fine with 4. God wont give us more then we cant bare.

I was rolled back to the room were I had to lay down for 30 minutes and rest. I had to pee really bad and I had to use a bed pan. I'm not exactly sure if those actually work but Tyler was wonderful cleaning up the mess... so embarrassing. Then the acupuncturist came in and did another treatment. Finally we were able to go home and I spent the rest of the day resting.

Its 4 days past transfer day and I don't feel any different. Occasionally I feel some nausea but then again that could be hormones talking, I get sleeping but I'm sure any one would be if they've just gone through all this. I guess my blood test on the 4th of July will let me know what's really going on....

Snap, Crackle, & Double Pop

Below are the four embryos implanted this past Saturday.


Saturday, June 23, 2007

Order Up

Today is the culmination of the past nine months of praying, pleading, and planning. Hannah concentrates on the first one and I pick up the slack on the latter two. We make a good team. The ride to the clinic this morning was an emotional one, much like rounding the final blind corner while overdriving your headlights. We all constantly make decisions with imperfect information, but none I have encountered had the gravity of today. Any attempt at rationalizing the situation fell painfully short; I always 'supersize' my combo meals, the per-capita cost goes down for each live birth, take an inconspicuous deep breath and go 'All In'. The closest practical decision point was simply put - If in end would we be more upset with having to restart the whole process from scratch or with having triplets. It is unnerving even typing that so from now it will be referred to as XXX.

Hannah has been exceptionally strong, amazingly resiliently, and uncompromisingly diligent throughout this journey. This alone gives me the confidence to handle whatever will become, and when combined with the cornerstone support of our family it can only be viewed as a brilliant adventure.

Darts Anyone?

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Retrieval Day

Last night I had a hard time going to sleep, I kept thinking of everything that could possibly go wrong. I woke up bright and early excited to start the day. Julie came to pick us up and took us to the clinic. We we're brought to the back into a room and I was asked to change into my dressing gown. We sat there for awhile our nurse coming in and out of our room and us signing some paper work. Finally the anaesthesiologist came in and he gave me my IV, I was then brought back to the procedure room. They gave me the good stuff and I remember counting down from 10 twice and the saying wow this stuff is awesome that's were I don't know what happened. I woke up about 30 minutes and they brought me back to the room I changed in. Apparently I was complaining about my left side hurting and they put a warm blanket on my side. The first thing I remember is them saying how is your left side and I sorta got worried thinking oh my gosh what happened with my left side. Then I heard Tyler outside the room and I kept moaning his name. Finally he came in the room and I said I want a kiss and told him how much loved him... all very sappy stuff I'm sure. Then he went into the room it only took about 10 minutes. He was so funny!!!! The first thing he did was look under his blanket at his balls (in front of the nurse) and said well there still there. Then he started asking for his hat and she came back and put it on his head. Then he pushed his bed as close as he could get to me to hold my hand. Tyler just kept checking for his balls finally I said babe why do you keep looking down at your balls and he said I looked at them before. I just started laughing!!!! Then he feels his head and realizes his hat is on and says sweet they let me do all this with my hat on? I said no you were just asking for it and they gave it to you.

As for all the results they found 18 eggs and they only had to go into Tyler one time... praise Jesus!!!

So then they had to teach Tyler how to give me my shot in my butty, it actually wasn't that bad it just felt like a cramped muscle during dance. Tyler just laughed at my butty (thanks babe). Then we dressed and were wheeled out of the doctors office and Julie was out front with the car waiting for us. We went to Safeway and picked up some drugs, water, Gatorade and snacks. We then went to Jamba Juice and got a smoothie and pretzel for lunch, they said that heavy fatty foods might make us sick. We got back to our room and have been in bed ever since. Tyler is feeling good not to bad just a headache. I on the other hand have taken some codeine and have a hard time moving, I'm experiencing cramps with some really sore muscles. It hurts to use the restroom. I'm just told I need to be drinking lots of water to help prevent the OHSS.

So tomorrow and some point we should find out what is going on with are "stuff" cant wait:)!!!

Retrieval Day pix's



Tuesday, June 19, 2007

just a few pix's


The first is just Tyler and I hanging out in our room... he is being super wonderful and the second is of him at the clinic reading the paper...

The day after the HCG shot

Yesterday's shot was perfectly on time and given. The shot was a piece of cake! I thought this doesn't sting then about 30 seconds later it hit and it stung. Today I just felt like I had a sore there and it would hurt to sit and stand, not a big deal just readjusting my body made it tender. I went to the clinic this morning for blood and then they sat Tyler and I down to give us directions for tomorrow. I got a call this afternoon saying that my blood and levels were all perfect but because my estrodol is high I must likely will cause ovarian hyper stimulation syndrome (OHSS) and they wanted to order me some more medication that I'll begin taking tomorrow.


OHSS is well... I guess I don't know but it causes your belly to fill with fluid. Its uncomfortable and if too much occurs you can be hospitalized where they have to drain the fluid for you belly. My friend Julie had this. If it doesn't go away its a good sign that my body is holding onto the pregnancy.

Not much else to say Tyler and I are just hanging in the hotel room and about ready to eat our last meal for awhile. Come midnight tonight no food for awhile. As soon as I'm feeling up to it tomorrow I'll post again.

Monday, June 18, 2007

Random acts of Incompetence

prepairing for harvest

This morning at 7:45 I had an appointment at the clinic. I got to monitor with our Doctor and he measured all the follicles. He said that he would like to see about 15-25 of them but I had 14 but he was 99% sure I would do my HCG shot tonight. I was pretty bummed that my number was lower so I've been praying for that extra boost before Wednesday. But God knows exactly what we need so I need to just trust in him. Well around 3 o'clock I got the official call from the clinic and tonight I trigger.

The HCG shot is the same as the trigger shot. This is another shot like the menupor that needs mixing. This will release all the eggs and mature them. It takes exactly 36 hours from that point to go in and retrieve them. So tonight at exactly 10:30 I will be injecting a very important shot into my belly so if you could just say a pray it would be much appreciated. The nurse said it would sting and I would get like a knot in my gut where I inject it (like an allergic reaction) but its OK its working. Then tomorrow morning at 7:30 Tyler and I have an appointment at the clinic where they will take my blood to make sure I did everything correctly and then they will sit us down to give us instructions for Tuesday night and Wednesday morning. Wednesday morning will be the retrieval.

It hit me this morning that this is happening really soon. We're so excited. I cant wait!!!

Saturday, June 16, 2007

We're in Seattle

Well were here. This morning we had an appointment at our clinic. We love how quick they are we got there signed in, immediately they took me back for blood work then I went in for my ultrasound. We were in and out in like 30 minutes. Everything seems to be looking good my follicles are getting big. I got a call this afternoon from the clinic about my injection doses for the weekend and Monday morning I have an appointment and then Monday night is the trigger shot. So this means that all the eggs will drop and finish there maturing and then Wednesday will be the big retrieval day.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Long day

This morning my mom came and picked me up and took me to my appointment. I had an ultrasound and blood work done. I had my mom video tape the ultrasound (on the screen) so that everyone could watch them counting all the follicles. I have about 14 right now but there not finished developing the doctor said I should have between 18-20. Oh but what I forgot to mention was that I went to the clinic and they didn't have me on the schedule. They said oh yeah we've been trying to get a hold of your clinic because they sent the work order but no date. I said well on the schedule I have this morning at 8:25, they were able to work me in...its a good thing they went to busy. So all went good there. Then I had to pick up some more mendopur but the clinic didn't open until 9:30 so I went home and my mom went back to work. Finally I get a hold of the pharmacy to double check that they had my medication. Then I left for the pharmacy. On the way there I got a call from the clinic in Portland saying they needed to reschedule my appointment for tomorrow and I told them that it had been cancelled so it was drooped then I continue driving and I get lost. My navigation system and sent me in a totally different area and so I decide to go back to another area and follow a different map... there is construction everywhere downtown Portland streets are closed everywhere and to top it off its the rose festival so there are people everywhere. I literally have to drive completely around downtown and finally I make it to the area where I can follow the map. Then a man comes and knocks on my window at a stop light. I HAVE A FLAT TIRE. So I pull over to the side of the road and sure enough I ain't going no where and I'm about 1.5 miles from the pharmacy. Do I need to mention I'm hormonal? Its not like I'm ovulating and there is just 1 no no no 14 + and I'm taking all the medication I'm fighting tears in the car. So I talk to Tyler and get the info for the road side assistance and because I'm not driving my car, Tyler's car or a rental its going to cost $120 bucks and I need wait an hour for him to get there then I have to ride all the way back to Vancouver to get it fixed then come back out to the pharmacy. I tried to just get the spare tire out but the thing is rusted into this car and there is about 3 inches of water in the base of it. So as I'm waiting for the toe truck two crazy men start hanging out by my car and so I lock the doors and roll up the windows (because there talking to me and there not all there) Then Melody calls and she says that her and Ben are coming to rescue me. So I cancel the truck and then get rescued but by the time they get there I'm drenched in sweat, there car's AC is broken and I look like I just got out of a swimming pool. Ben looks at the tires and guess what it wasn't one tire it was 3!!! Good thing I didn't get on the freeway. So while Ben is working on the car Melody takes me to get my medication and some lunch. Then I get a call from the clinic saying they need me to have an appointment tomorrow in Portland and I said I had one today and my husband comes in tomorrow. Well turns out the lady that schedules the out of town patients is out of town and hasn't left very good notes or tied up any loose ends. So then they say well you can just stay there Friday and have an appointment and Saturday will see you. I say no I'll be in Seattle tomorrow I have an appointment Friday in Kirkland at 8:30 and I will be there for that appointment. So she repeats it right back to me and she knows why I'll be in Kirkland. Then I get a call from Portland saying they have a work order for me on Friday and they need to schedule an appointment... I said no you don't there confused I'll be in Kirkland on Friday at their office. Ugh!!!! To top it off my back hurts and I feel sick and all I want is excederine and red bull....

But no worries as bad as it was today all is forgotten because tomorrow I see my bumpkin!!!!

Monday, June 11, 2007

Much better tonight

After last night I told my Dad I needed a nurse and fortunately a girl I grew up with but was never really close to is a nurse now. I went to her house tonight and she helped me work out the kinks... apparently I was putting to much air into the vial. She helped me with the shot then filled everything back up with fake stuff so that I could just practice for awhile and she could make sure I was doing it right.... I tell you my injection training was not very good.

But to update you on the reaction to my medication.... I'm getting lots of cramping, which is understandable since I'm not growing 1 egg... I'm growing a whole lot more!!!! I tossed and turned last night breaking out into sweet. My belly is so tender too, I have so many marks on it and its only getting worse. I just laid around today on my parents couch and watched Discovery Health Channel (its baby week).

Tomorrow morning at 8 o'clock I have an appointment at the clinic and they are just going to take my blood and then by the afternoon I should find out were my levels are out, I'm excited to hear whats going on inside my body.

Sunday, June 10, 2007

Stupid doctor made me cry!

So mad!!!! OK, so tonight I had to take my first injection of menopur. I was told to put 1 c.c of water into the powder then mix. Then I draw up the medicine switch needles and inject. Well I put the water into the needle, put it into the powder and the powder turned to paste!!! I was freaked out! I called Julie right away and was like what am I suppose to do? Julie told me to call the office and they would transfer me to the doctor on call. I get to the doctor and let him know that my powder turned to paste and asked what I should do. Very rudely he says well use another water and powder! I was like ok but is my water correct is it gonna turn into paste again? He was like I don't know I've never had this happen before! Literally is is barking at me on the phone. So I do it again and I'm shacking because I'm about ready to cry and so scared. Plus its not like this is cheap medicine and because of it not mixing I need to get more of it. So I get it mixed then draw it up into the needle and guess what I'm short about 1/2 a ml. So I take what I can and call Julie crying and she says that the doctor must have been Dr. (cant remember his name) she said she had him once and he was mean. Then Mark gets on the phone and starts explaining the way to draw it up and mix it.... so helpful. The lady that gave me instructions before had never done it before so she missed a few key parts. Then I called Tyler and cried. He listened to me and made me feel better. Then I called my Dad and said I need a nurse! I said I don't care who it is but I need someone here with me tomorrow to make sure I don't ruin this again. So tomorrow I should have someone to make sure I do it right. So if you can all just be praying right now that this isn't going to ruin my stimulation and that my missing dosage isn't going to ruin any of this that would be wonderful.

I love you all... so for the mad blog....( I guess it doesn't help I'm super hormonal)

Friday, June 8, 2007

So soon?

So this morning I went to the clinic for my ultrasound and blood work. Everything looked good but I still had to wait for my clinic to call. So at 2 o'clock I get a call letting me know that everything looks good and that Im starting my follistim shots tomorrow morning along with my lupron and then in the evening I'll be taking menopur (this will only be for 5 days). Tyler will also start some antabiotics tomorrow. Then they moved up my appoinment on Tuesday to Monday and they then want me up in Seattle for the rest of my appointments. They told me not to be alamed by switching this all up they said that because I was so healthy they thought my body would react really well to the medicine therefor making my eggs develope quicker. Melinda one of the ladies that works at the clinic walked me through the medications again and wow I didnt realise there was so many needles. I'm starting to get more nervous...

Thursday, June 7, 2007

I freaked out...

sorry if this is too much information.....

Yesterday morning I woke took my shot and went to the restroom and low and behold I started my cycle.... now I was told I may experience some spotting but this wasn't spotting this was a lot more then that. So I called the clinic and I left a message then around 1:30 I called again. I was a nervous wreck wondering if the drugs weren't working and wondering if I would have to be apart from my husband longer. Finally at 4 o'clock I got a call from one of the nurses and she was like everything is fine your not actually on a cycle your lining is just bleeding this is fine it just a side affect of the birth control. Wow so what a relief!!! As for today still sick. I cant eat much, I take a few bites and feel sick to my stomach. My little sister is spending the night with me tonight and she is gonna take me to my doctors appointment tomorrow morning. Here come all the appointments... this is getting so close!!!

Wednesday, June 6, 2007

Nothing exciting

I stopped the birth control yesterday. I felt like I was forgetting something all evening. Today I've just been feeling sick. Melody and I were doing some errands and she would have to pull over because I would get light headed and naushas ... she was afraid I was going to through up in the car but nope all was fine. I took a long nap this afternoon, I've been in a funk today wanting to leave or play outside but the weather is crummy and then the sick thing wasn't helping. Boobs are still getting bigger. I went shopping with my mom last Friday and bought a bigger sports bra, my normal bras still work but there overflowing.... I welcome the change. 9 days till Tyler gets here or 21 injections how ever you want to count it. I miss him like crazy!!!! I HATE HATE HATE HATE being away from him. But he calls me everday he says because he is bored but I think its because he misses me!!! Friday is my next apt. so hopefully I'll have something interesting to share... until then...

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Body changes

My boobs started growing during the birth control, then I noticed my clothes were getting tighter. No joke by Sunday my bra's were tight and yesterday when I was wearing my fat shorts I had to change out of them because they were too tight. AHHH so today I'm off to the mall to buy some drawstring pants or even some work out pants that fit.

I feel sick!!! Started yesterday. Totally felt wonderful then I started playing with my friend Beth's kids and it hit me. The rest of the evening it came it spurts. I'd feel like I was gonna puke then it would go away. Nothing like that this morning, I think when I lay around and sit its fine, its as soon as I get some what active it hits.

Monday, May 28, 2007

Lupron injections

Call me weird but I was actually excited about giving myself my first injection. I kept waking up in the night to make sure I hadn't missed my alarm because I need to take my shot between 4 and 8 in the morning, but whatever it is I need to be consist ant so my alarm clock is set to 7:30. I woke up got Melody out of bed to video tape and went to it. I'll post the video as soon as I get a hold of my husband and he is able to walk me through it.

Anyways the shot wasn't bad it felt like I was getting pricked by a needle and then after the injection the area looked like a bug bite. It was a bit tender at first but now I feel nothing. I made sure to read all the symptoms that can be brought on by these injections and there were thinks like irregular heart beat, nerve damage... a huge list!!! But most common where hot flashes, bone aches and nausea. I'm proud to say I didn't even get a head ache. I feel amazing in fact I feel like I have a lot of energy. Basically Lupron is like hormones I pumping into myself so I'm wondering if maybe I need to find a better vitamin that will natural produce more.

I am experiencing some spotting though. I was told this shouldn't happen until I stop my birth control but I started it yesterday so I know it has nothing to do with the shot. The clinic was closed to tomorrow I'll call them and inform them, I'm sure its nothing but I just want to make sure. Hopefully tomorrow I'll get the video posted for all you that want to see it.

Love ya!!!

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Feeling Blue

I'm so glad I don't have to take birth control, I hate it! Its hard to tell what I'm feeling, I'm done with my cycle but I'm a ball of emotions and the only thing I'm on is birth control. I've cut out all caffeine so that could be part of it as well. I just want to cry and I need my husband to hold me! I'm usually the life of the party running around and going crazy with my nieces and nephews but I'm feeling irritated being around sound. I just want quite but when its quite I'm just depressed. Only 11 more days of the birth control... although this is probably the easy part of all this.... Only 22 days till I see my husband... sounds like forever!

Friday, May 18, 2007

Baseline blood work and ultrasound

I had my baseline ultrasound and blood work this morning at 8:30. I was so excited that I woke up around 3:30 and kept looking at my clock.

I brought my friend Melody along with me. She is so funny!!! An experience will always be remember with Melody. I'm sitting in the waiting room filling out paper work and she starts laughing when she hears the people in the back saying "you've come into see us twice and both times we've told you that you need to gain more weight" then she stomped out of the office. So then the lady comes to get me and I ask if my girlfriend can come in and watch. Well then it dawns on me that they're probably thinking were lesbians. They figure it out later though when I start talking about my husband. So as I'm waiting in the procedure room Melody is talking about a friend of ours that has ugly kids... I'm like shhhh Mel people in this clinic would die for an ugly kid. So then the doctor comes in and he was asking about what was going on and then Melody goes into the story... "well there from Atlanta and there doing the procedure in Seattle because they have some friends up there that did it and she is monitoring here where her family is but they want to go to Seattle to do this so that there not near family and its just them ya know?" I'm laughing with Melody later saying its not a big deal people to out of town monitoring all time... she was just thinking that they were upset that they wernt getting all our business. Then during the ultrasound she gets to see everything on the screen and she is like "wow" "that's so cool" "oh my gosh that's crazy" She just makes me laugh I really cant focus on anything except for how funny she is. Then once all that was done they took my blood and now they are sending the results up to Kirkland ad I should have a call from them this afternoon telling me to start my birth control and aspirin.

Thursday, May 17, 2007

WOO HOO!!!

I started my cycle and I've never been more excited for this time of the month. I'm jumping up and down and ready to yell it from the roof tops..... " I STARTED!!!!!!!!" I just called the clinic and the receptionist just wanted me to leave a voice mail for this lady who isnt going to be in today and I had to call back multiple times and get tossed around because I have to have an appointment tomorrow morning. So until then....

Medication


Just though you might want to see some of my drugs... I've got an additional 3 boxes in the fridge. I guess it doesn't look to scary... just a lot of needles.

Trial Transfer

May 17, 2007

Well on Tuesday I flew in to Portland and was met by my Mom and sister and then I got into my sisters car drove to Melody and Ben’s dropped off my suitcases and did a quick repack before taking off to Seattle. I drove all the way to Mark and Julie’s house, were we stayed up talking for a long while. It’s so nice having someone like them around. They next morning I got to play with the triplets … they are so beautiful!!! Then I drove to the clinic.

It took a little over 3 hours to get to the clinic because of traffic. I was supposed to do my trial transfer on a full bladder so on the way down I drank my water. Then while being stuck in traffic I really had to go… BAD!!!! After about 45 min of needing to go bad it just plain hurt. I get close to the clinic and then there is construction and I sit there while the road worker has his sign on stop and these trucks are in the middle of the road moving way to slow. Finally we are able to go and I take the wrong turn. By the time I get to the clinic I have to park my car in the garage and the only place I could find was in the back. I got out of the car and walked like a duck to the office. As soon as I get in I ask “can I please go a little it stings?” So I was able to let a little out. Then about 5 minutes later I’m ready to go again and they say ok just a little more. The finally called be back 15 minutes late and laid down on the exam table she began my ultra sound and said wow you do have full bladder so I said “does that mean I can pee a little more?” so she said sure do you want to change back into your pants or just go. I said I need to go. So holding my paper towel wrap I ran around the clinic to the nearest rest room. Then I went back to the exam room.

Basically the procedure starts off like a pap smear. They insert the clamp (doing ultra sounds the whole time) then they took a few samples of the swab samples and then they tested the needle. During the actual procedure they don’t want to hurt you and then need to put the needle in at exactly the right place so they need to do measuring. They determined how far the up the needle should go. The whole thing took about minutes. The doctor informed me that my bladder could be less empty the day of the procedure. Whem… I don’t think I could relax with all that much in my bladder.

Once I was done I went to the front desk and asked about when I would do my injection training and then a lady in the office said she would do it with me. So I was taken to a back room where a lady named Sarah showed me the ropes of injection and walked me through all of the medications. I was able to practice giving shots into a pad and drawing them and mixing them. I really feel so much better about all that. Once you know what you’re doing needles aren’t that intimidating. Although when practicing grabbing my skin and finding where to shoot myself will be a challenge. I lack fat on my gut but the needles aren’t to long and I should be fine.

Then I drove back to Portland and I was sooo sooo sooo tired!!!! I stopped to get lunch, gas and even toiletries because I needed to walk around to stay awake. I then went to my brothers and parents house and then Melody took me to my new home for the next 6 weeks. Melody is the best friend a girl could have. She has prepared a room for me with all new bedding and sheets. It looks like a peaceful retreat in here. I unpacked my bags and she drew a milk bath for me and a eucalyptus towel for my neck. When I was done here friend Mary came up and blew dry my hair and gave me a head and neck massage and then Melody tucked me into bed, where I slept for 9 and half hours… and now I’m laying in bed typing this.

Wednesday, May 9, 2007

Big blessings

I've been working on ordering all our medications. (More then I can count) I'm going to be one druged up women... Anyways I got a call from the pharmacy and it turn out our insurance picked up half of it!!!!! Which we didnt think they would cover any of it.

Monday, April 23, 2007

Schedule

I just got the projected schedule.

5/17/07 - cycle begins.
5/18/07 - baseline blood and ultrasound. Start birth control pills and low-dose aspirin
5/28/07 - begin lupron injections
6/03/07 - take last birth control pill continue lupron injections
6/08/07 - suppression check, blood work and ultrasound
6/09/07 - begin gonadotropin injections
6/12/07 - blood work
6/14/07 - blood work every 1-2 days until the follicles are mature
6/18/07 - Trigger date (may change depending on my response to meds)
* this injections will trigger the final maturation of the eggs. Apparently very
painful and I will need Tyler to give it to me.
6/19/07 - blood work
6/20/07 - RETRIEVAL DAY
6/21/07 - find out how many eggs fertilized
6/23/07
or
6/25/07 - transfer... I need a full bladder then must rest quietly at home for the rest of the day.
then begin prometrium tablets
7/04/07 - PREGNANCY TEST

Friday, April 20, 2007

April 20, 2007

Yesterday I called the clinic and they are putting together our schedule right now. As soon as I get it I will let you know.

Today I went up into our Guest room and sat in the cozy chair that the previous owners left and belted out my favorite worship song.

“I come to the garden alone
While the dew is still on the roses
And the voice I hear falling on my ear
The son of God discloses

And he walks with me and he talks with me
And he tells me I am his own
And the joy we share as we terry there
No other has ever known

he speaks and the sound of his voice
Is so sweet the birds hush there singing
And the melody that he gave to me
Within my heart is ringing”

The second verse has always been my favorite…. One thing not everyone knows about me and something I hold so dearly… When I was like 17 I was lying in bed asleep and I heard a voice say “Hannah I love you” I sat up in bed and nobody was awake and I had shivers, there was such a peace that filled my room that night. I hold that voice so close to my heart and I hear it in my head in those times I’m really poring it out to God. All the many times I’ve begged God for a child, I knew he was listening and I could just hear that voice again and again “Hannah, I love you”.

Another thing you may or may not know is how I got my name. My parents loved the story of Hannah in the bible and so they named me after her. Growing up I’d say “I’m just like Hannah” (seriously, but did I really know) But in the last few years I’ve really felt as though I’ve understood her more and felt a connection with who she was. Today I read the story again and I couldn’t control the tears… I love the part in 1 Samuel 1:19 Where it says “and the Lord remembered her” God is so good, HE IS SO GOOD. My heart is so full right now of thankfulness and the love for my savior. I may just have to turn on some music and dance before the Lord (because the fact that I can dance is another miracle… because God healed these legs and I will forever use them to show him glory and honor!!!!) AMEN!!!!!!! AMEN!!!!!! AMEN!!!!!!!

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

April 18, 2007

Today it all came together…
Last night I was completely restless! I tossed and turned for hours and when that happens I talk to God (until I zone off and fall asleep). My cycle started getting irregular and I was a little stressed out that it would be so late the next few times that I would not be able to go through with IVF and I was stressed about the financial situation. There are other fears too like what if it doesn’t work, I prayed last night and said God if this is your will for me right now then I have to start my period tomorrow we have to have the money thing lined up tomorrow. So this morning I woke up and went to my dance practice and wa-la I’ve never been happier for my cycle to begin. Then the strangest thing happened I got a call from the Clinic (I haven’t said anything to them about being ready). They call me to let me know that they did there evaluation (with all the staff) on us this week (they do this with every couple) and they were ready for us to start as soon as my next cycle began… how God is that!!! Then I told Tyler and guess what? Through the help of our AMAZING family we will financially be able to go through this. I almost can’t believe it. I started crying happy tears tonight. I really have so much faith that it’s all going to work because God has gone above what I asked for and confirmed that it’s meant to be. Tomorrow I’ll call the clinic to be put on the schedule.

This is seriously going to be the best 2 months ever… well maybe a bit hormonal…lol.
I’m dancing at church this week then I have one week of repairing my house before Heidi, Chris and the kids come for a week. They leave the 11th and then Tyler and I leave that afternoon for Texas for his cousin’s wedding then the next day is Sunday and I fly to Portland and wait for my cycle (but I’ll have some of the best company in the mean time) then come the 17th (if my cycle is on time) I begin…. I just feel like the time is flying by… I’m so Happy!!!

Monday, February 26, 2007

February 26, 2007

Its been killing me that I had to wait till May to go through with this and now I have to wait longer. I was banking on my little sister buying LaCamas Dance from me and that was the money we were going to use for the IVF. I just feel like crap. I think it all sucks. God will give me that child in his timing. I just keep thinking of Hannah in the bible the story my parents loved so much they named me after her. Funny how similar we are.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

January 23, 2006

Today was my SHG. I was told to drink 30 oz of water an hour before showing up, I didn’t know if my bladder could hold that much. Basically all I was told is that was a ultra sound done with a full bladder. No big deal right. So I get to the clinic and I’m starting to sweet I have to pee so bad. Then I get in and the doctor hasn’t come back from lunch yet so I’m forced to hold myself another 15 min. In fact I couldn’t sit down I was pacing the floor sweating. They called the doctor to see where she was at and she told me that I could “let a little out” because I shouldn’t be in that much pain. So they asked if I could try going and stopping, I told them I didn’t know if I was gonna be able to stop once I started. Eventually I let a little out and I felt much better. Finally they bring me back into the exam room and have me lay on a bed and they put the jelly on my belly and do the “ultra sound thing”. Then she handed me a probe and told me I could go ahead and probe myself. So in front of the doctor I stick it up there. She is going through my pictures and says wow you bladder is really full and you really shouldn’t be this full, next time a doctor says to drink so much don’t drink that much because you have a tiny bladder. Then once that is done I was like wow that was fairly easy (besides the holding the bladder part) and then she says alright go to the rest room because the next part of your test your bladder has to be completely empty. I was like what I thought that that was all of it. So I go to the rest room come back out and lay back down on the bed. I laid there watching the nurse prep the area and since I had no clue what was to come I was really surprised when they pulled out a looooong needle about the length of my foot. Then the doctor came in and said I need you to go to the rest room again because there can be absolutely nothing in your bladder. So I went and came back and just like before it started with a clamp…and once again she had to yank on my uterus because she had it in there wrong (the thought makes me want to cringe). Then they took out these long tweezers and at the end was a cloth of iodine that they put inside me and told me it needed to sock in there for awhile… it was very cold. Then after I was all sterilized I found out what the needle was for. They were going to give me a shot through my uterus to see how thick my lining was and determine if I had endometriosis… (I always though I did because I was told at my first gyno ever that since everyone in my family has had it I most likely had a least a small case of it. I also get bladder and colon spasms which they say is a result of endometriosis.) Well anyways they put the shot in and I immediately started shacking and going cold. The shot stung but I did start going into shock (gees Louise am I a wuss or what?) So then they pull our a big cylinder thing and they attach it to the needle because all the liquid is going into my uterus. I really wish that Tyler was there holding my hand. Finally it was done and I was wondering why they never warned me about this and why they never told me to take advil. When I was done they told me that I couldn’t have a more perfect reproductive system in fact my insides where so perfect they were beautiful. As I was leaving the office everyone was wish me luck and asked for me to keep them updated. One lady really wanted to meet me. Her best friends husband has CF and he is a doctor. In fact she told her friend about me and her friend told her to tell me “way to go, never give up and never let anyone tell us no” She had me crying. All the ladies where so sweet and they made me promise to keep them updated and send pictures. I guess since it was an actual radiology center they don’t get many young people and most people are getting stuff done for like cancer treatment and stuff… I was coming in hopes of bringing a new life….

Thursday, January 18, 2007

January 18, 2007

I went in for my HSG today. I was told to take 3-4 advil 30min. before to help with cramping. I was then called later to make sure they told me about the advil. All the warnings started making me nervous so I took m 4 advil and left for the appointment. During the procedure they fill your tubes with a liquid die and take x-rays to see if your normal. The procedure starts off like a pap smear with the clamp and all well the lady put the clamp in then the tub (like a skinny hose) then realized she put the clamp in wrong and said sorry I’m gonna have to yank on your uterus. I was already cramping really bad I was like “OH HELL” I will say I felt a bit better once she fixed it but the fixing part was not very pleasant. I got to watch the screen as they did the procedure and it was really amazing seeing it like that… Of course I was really cramped up and trying really hard to breath… I was just trying to think of that baby I wanted so badly. I was also thinking if this hurts this bad I’m definitely going to need an epidural. Then they wanted me to lay on my right side (I did not want to move) so me being the dance teacher that I am I got all confused with right and left. I was saying your right or my right then I went to my left side… then I had to move again…. I was so happy when it was done.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

January 16, 2007

I have an order from Dr. Opsahl to get a HSG and a SHG. I called my Gyno and he wouldn’t do them he claimed that if I was pregnant then it could injure the baby. I was like well I can’t get pregnant until I get this done. He knew where doing the IVF too. The clinic did give me a name of radiology clinic that should do it because I had the doctor’s note. I was able to schedule an appointment for Thursday the 18th and the next for Tuesday the 23rd. I called the clinic that Dr. Opsahl suggested I check out for monitoring since he new one of the doctors but they no longer will monitor people who are going out of town. I called Emory clinic too but I never heard back. Tyler and I thought about it and we possibly might just have me stay with my Aunt or a friend in Kirkland during all the monitoring just so there is no mix ups and to make sure nothing goes wrong.

Friday, January 12, 2007

January 12, 2007

We left for Portland on January 11th. We decided to fly to Portland so we could see the family, I haven’t been home for about 8 months and Tyler hasn’t been back since we moved. There was snow on the ground and I got to see everyone. We left for the clinic early on the 12th when we got there I already loved the clinic it was a smaller environment then the last place and everyone seems so friendly! Tyler kept making jokes about how he though the doctor was going to be sick and they were going to have to reschedule. Well as soon as he met with us he said I’m not going to shake your hand I’m sick today… Tyler called it. The Doctor was so friendly and we both liked him. He gave Tyler an exam to determine if he had sperm. I guess they can tell by the size of the testacies. Well Tyler is a wonderful size. Then it was my turn I had an ultra sounds done of my insides. It was really cool to watch on the screen. I kept thinking the whole time how much cooler it would be when I could see a baby on the screen. Tyler was watching my toes the whole time he thought that the ultra sound looked painful and he was watching my toes to make sure they weren’t curling up. After our exams we went and talked to the financial lady. She was so nice and easy to talk to. I like there way of handling things at this clinic. Basically they’ll bill your insurance first and it they don’t cover it then they’ll send it to you. Everything seemed so much more reasonable, we need to find a clinic back home that will do my monitoring so we still need to look into the costs of the monitoring. We then went and got our lab work taken then we left for our hotel.

That night we finally met Mark, Julie and the babies. We had so much fun I could have spent the whole night talking. Their babies are just so beautiful. Even Tyler was saying in the car how cute they were.

Tuesday, January 2, 2007

January 2, 2007

We’ve scheduled an appointment with Northwest center for reproductive sciences in Kirkland WA. Were meeting with Dr. Opsahl January 12th at 2:00. We were able to find a great rate on tickets and I’m soooo excited.

Formerly "Scrambled Eggs"